There was no shattering of glasses. Instead, there was a deep thud and Monica’s sharp cry of pain. The cup must have hit her.
“Please, Ms. Tanner. Could you please consider leaving Christopher alone? You know how guilty he will feel if he finds out about this,” she uttered.
“Get out!” I howled at her with all my might.
Why must it be me? Why? We had been on a vacation when death brushed by us. Just went we managed to break free from its claws, it came knocking at my door again.
When Monica finally came back to her senses, she stood up and apologized seriously, “Forgive me. All I could think of was Chris. I really shouldn’t have said such things. I should’ve thought about you too. Just forget everything I said. I shouldn’t have come in the first place.”
Monica stood still for a second and before long she turned around and locked her gaze on me. “Perhaps he might think you died on the seas. That would be better for him. At least he will be spared of the grief of watching you die right in front of him.”
With that said, she closed the door. I was left alone again in the cold room, separated from the warmth of the outside world. I felt so cynical about life all of a sudden. A voice in my heart told me that I should have died on the island.
It would be better if I had sacrificed myself for the man I loved and died there and then. I would not need to go through the agony of facing my own death or think about how Christopher would take it if I had died, but life was fixated on playing a joke on me.
I had survived. I was delighted when I knew both of us had made it out alive, but I was quickly faced with death again.
Soon after, night descended, and dizziness took hold of me again. Although it felt worse than the other episodes I had earlier, I did not completely blackout.
I panted desperately as I lay in my bed. Just when I was feeling better, Darius came in and brought me some candies. At the sight of them, my eyes lit up briefly. I did not have a habit of eating lollipops when I was a kid, and even after I grew up, I did not have a chance to enjoy such indulgence.
Darius told me that my mom had a sweet tooth; she used to love lollipops. I had a try, savoring the sweetness on my tongue, but somehow, it had a slight taste of bitterness to me. It was probably because I was too caught up in my sorrow.
“The bodyguard told me something happened in the afternoon. Did Monica say something to you?” I could tell Darius was concerned.
I shot him a smile and shook my head. “No, she didn’t. I’m just not used to her showing me pity. I have my ego too.”
“Do you want to go to Anglandur? They have the best experts over there, and they have seen more cases of your disease compared to the doctors here. They might be able to cure your disease if you go abroad. They have better technology over there too.”
“Anglandur…” His proposal gave me hope, but I did not want to leave Christopher behind. I could not bear to be apart from him.
“I’ll decide after Christopher wakes up. He’ll be so mad if I leave him alone. He always gives me the silent treatment when he’s angry.”
I could not sleep the whole night. When Darius told me Christopher had woken up, I got off my bed and stumbled my way to his ward, but I could not muster my courage to enter.
“Darius, tell him I died. I don’t want to see him.”
